While the messy roommate and the inconsiderate roommate may be sometimes one in the same, it’s not always the case. Sometimes you just have a roommate who plays their music on high until 3 am, takes your food from the fridge, and doesn’t do their fair share of the chores. What do you do about this type of roommate?
Well it’s a little bit harder with an inconsiderate roommate than just a messy roommate. This is because there are generally a whole range of different behaviors you have a problem with; not just one. However, like with the messy roommate, you should certainly talk with them about what is bothering you the most about their behavior.
With any sort of discussion like this, the first thing you want to do before you even talk with your roommate, is to think about what are the things that are really bothering you and how you will handle the situation. It is best to come up with your responses to the possible reactions your roommate may have about the situation.
When you’ve decided what you’re going to say and when you’re going to say it, you should be sure that you avoid approaching this situation as a “confrontation.” You should avoid thinking about these types of situations as a “confrontation” because this will automatically freak you out and will cause you to react poorly. It’s best to keep an open mind and go into the situation thinking about a positive outcome for both you and your roommate. This will keep both you and hopefully your roommate, positive.
Like with any discussion of this nature, it’s also best to focus on the specific behaviors that bug you the most, and avoid blaming it on personality flaws. It will not only cause your roommate to become defensive, and possibly hostile, but it will also ensure that you will have a less-than-satisfying outcome to your discussion.
Overall, with any problem you experience with your roommate, it’s best to come at the situation with an idea of what you’ll say, an idea of how both of you will react, with hope for a positive outcome, and an understanding its not a personality flaw that is causing the problem. While it may seem like a lot to remember, having that sometimes-difficult discussion will not only be better for your psyche, but it will be better for your roommate, and the relationship.